Are you a good enough mum?

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Not long now until I open The Confident Mother online conference at 8pm on Monday 12 January. I’m starting to realise there are quite a few details not yet complete! Eeek – I’m going to be super busy this week. I want this online event to be something really fabulous for you and for all mums.

In fact for me, it starts on Sunday 11 January because one of the interviews will be recorded in advance due to technology and scheduling challenges. Miriam McCaleb is officially on maternity leave but has kindly agreed to be interviewed. I was so delighted when she said yes.

Miriam is one of the scientific advisors at the Brainwave Trust in New Zealand. Their key aim is to raise public awareness about new findings in brain research and to educate everyone who has an impact on the early life of tamariki/children about the important implications of this knowledge on our children’s physical, social, intellectual and emotional development.

This to me is SUCH an important part of being a mother, a father, or any caregiver. I love reading the research and writings of people such as Miriam, Pennie Brownlee, Dr Margot Sunderland, Professor Jaak Panksepp and the effects of the adult-child interaction on how our children’s brains develop. Truly fascinating and one of the original driving forces for me to create this conference.

You can read more about Miriam at the http://baby.geek.nz/ website.

I have to give a big shout-out to Pennie Brownlee because she helped set up the interview with Miriam. And that came about via a connection with her daughter (thank you Clare). She had heard via a Facebook parenting group that I was looking for an expert who could explain how our children and their brain development can be affected but our parenting. I want somebody who could explain it in words that anybody, any mother, could understand. Our understanding of neuroscience has changed and evolved incredibly over the past few years however, from my perspective, much of this information has not yet reached the wider public. Many of the health professionals and mums that I talk to, do have some understanding but it’s not yet part of the public’s tacit knowledge.

How often do you hear when a mum goes to cuddle her crying baby “you’re making a rod for your own back” or “she needs to cry it out – she needs to learn how to self-settle” or “is she a good baby?” or “is she sleeping through yet”. And yet we also hear so many stories of mums who feel guilty about breastfeeding, about not breastfeeding, about hearing their baby cry while they’re in the shower, about co-sleeping or not co-sleeping, wanting to have their body back, wanting a “normal” life again, about leaving their child with a childminder, about going back to work, being a stay-at-home mum.

What I would love more than anything in the world, is for ALL mums to have the confidence to know and truly believe that good enough really is good enough. That none of us needs to be the perfect mother. And I believe passionately that if we all understood how our children’s brains develop, that we would be so much closing to understanding that good enough IS good enough.

By the way, if you want to listen to all 20+ interviews live in the 21 day online conference, you need to register in advance. And it’s quick and easy to do. Simply sign up here to get on the mailing list so that you get a link in advance of each interview.

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